THE WEST WING "INAUGURATION PART II: OVER THERE" TELEPLAY BY: AARON SORKIN STORY BY: DAVID GERKEN & GENE SPERLING DIRECTED BY: LESLI LINKA GLATTER TEASER FADE IN: INT. TOBY'S OFFICE THURSDAY THREE DAYS BEFORE INAUGURATION We are in Toby's office looking through the window at Will in his office typing on his computer. Toby throws a ball up against the window, and Will comes into Toby's office. WILL You're not ever worried about the window breaking? TOBY During moments of peak frustration. When the Speaker of the House threatens to repeal the 16th Amendment. A couple of Yankee games. And there was the time Congress censured my boss. But it's always held up, that window. That window's a game-day player. WILL What do you need? TOBY Leo was just in here. [closes the door] What did you say to the President last night? WILL The President came to my office. He just dropped in. TOBY I know. What did you say? WILL His speech transcript was right on top. He read it. TOBY What did you say? WILL He said, "Why is a Khundunese life worth less to me than an American life?" And I said, "I dont know, sir, but it is." TOBY Didn't we talk about this? WILL Yes. TOBY But you gave it a shot anyway? WILL I wasn't giving it a shot, Toby, it was a casual conversation. TOBY With the President? WILL He came here. He was standing in my doorway. TOBY The Dow plummets because of casual conversations with this man, but that's not the point. WILL What's the point? TOBY You can't get in his head this close to something this important. You've got to keep the train on the tracks. WILL I apologize, but there's... TOBY No, no "but" at the end of that. Not on this one. This one haunts him. It haunts everyone. WILL Well, I finished the language. TOBY How is it? WILL Bloodless, compromising and half a loaf. TOBY That's foreign policy. They exit Toby's office and enter WILL'S OFFICE. Will clears his throat and begins to read what he's written. WILL "America stands today as the one truly indispensaple nation-- the strongest force and the proudest voice for peace, pluralism and prosperity that the world has ever known." TOBY Okay, keep the ancient Romans out of the first ten rows, and we're fine. WILL "Today at the dawn of a new century, America needs a new commitment to protect our own security, to model freedom to the world." TOBY To model it? WILL I figure if we're not going to help create freedom from tyranny, then let's at least sell some BarcaLoungers. TOBY The U.S. doesn't help create freedom from tyranny? WILL I forget to add, "where our own interests aren't necesssarly involved." [reading speech] "To do what we can to fulfill humanity's promise and to prove that self-determination is the watchword of all mankind." TOBY The watchword of all mankind? I don't know what the means. WILL Don't worry, neither will anyone else. TOBY The speech is good. It's better than good. There's one paragraph that's vague, and we're going to live with it. Toby starts to walk out. WILL Which is more than you can say for the Kundunese. TOBY I'll be in my office. Toby walks out and Will starts to talk. Toby comes back. WILL I heard once-- I don't know if this is true-- I heard once that you convinced the President to let you rewrite a section of the State of the Union with less than 24 hours to go. It was the second year, and everybody was a Republican whether they were or not, and people at the DNC convinced him to include the line, "The era of big government is over," and you couldn't live with it. Because government should be a place where people come to gather, and no one gets left behind. An instrument of good. And that's exactly what we heard in the State of the Union the next night. TOBY There were maybe four people in the room when I had that conversation. WILL Well, if I'd had been one of them, I'd have repeated it to everyone I met. Anyway, I'm going to move on to some language in trade and commerce. TOBY Okay. Toby walks out of Will's office and back into his. SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES. END TEASER * * * ACT ONE FADE IN: INT. PRESS BRIEFING ROOM - NIGHT FRIDAY NIGHT REPORTER JOHN I'm sorry, was Nigeria in that meeting? C.J. Ghana, Nigeria, and what did I say? REPORTER JOHN Zaire. C.J. Ghana, Nigeria and Zaire. The Arkutu meet with representatives from those countries. They met for three hours, and we're told the talks were amicable but that no progress was made. Steve? REPORTER STEVE C.J., there's a 1948 U.N. Convention on Genocide, and the U.S. is a signatory. Simply put, it says that if it's determined that genocide is taking place, the United States is compeled to intervene. C.J. The problem is the Convention distinguishes between acts of genocide and genocide. REPORTER KATIE It distinguishes between acts of genocide and genocide? C.J. It does. Mark? REPORTER MARK How many acts of genocide constitute a genocide? C.J. I don't know. Danny? DANNY What's the weather report for Sunday? C.J. Two below with the wind chill. That's a full lid. Good night. REPORTERS C.J., thank you. Good night, C.J. DANNY Two below, that's beach weather for the President. C.J. Yes. C.J. and Danny walk to the HALLWAY. DANNY So, what is the distinction? C.J. Danny, I have no idea. I have no idea what the distinction is. All I know is I got a memo from State-- close your notebook-- a memo from State to make sure not to call it genocide. DANNY I want to talk to you about something. C.J. No, we're not going to do that anymore. We're not going to talk about Shareef. DANNY This isn't about Shareef. C.J. Okay, then what? DANNY It's a little about Shareef. C.J. Good day to you, sir. DANNY C.J. C.J. I said, good day, sir. DANNY Get in there, would you? C.J. Nobody takes me seriously when I say "good day, sir." DANNY Get in there. They go inside C.J.'S OFFICE. C.J. Did you find the pilot? DANNY Shareef's pilot? C.J. I can't remember his name. DANNY Jamil Bari? C.J. Yeah. DANNY Yes, I did. He went to Augsbury Aviation in Bulgaria. He's survived by his wife, Marita, and his two children. C.J. You don't even want to say you were wrong and apologize for your superior attitude lately. DANNY I do. First I want to tell you this. C.J. Rifts at the Pentagon. DANNY Jets and the Sharks. I talked to an officer who works in U.S. foreign intelligence activities there, who believes that Miles Hutchinson is the Commander-in-Chief. And in the course of the discussion he told me, the President had rescinded Executive Orders 11905 and 12333. C.J. The President hasn't rescinded any Executive Orders. DANNY Well, not publicly. This was an incredibly clumsy attempt on the part of this officer to send a turf message to the President, and obviously he's not a rogue, so I thought I'd give you the heads-up. C.J. Tha President appreciates it, and it's not like it's anything new. I don't know who the Jets are and who the Sharks are, but it's Fitzwallace and Hutchinson. DANNY That's pretty much what I'm writing. Who here can a researcher talk to about Pentagon employees who are detailed to the White House? C.J. Josh's office. You can get it from Donna. DANNY Okay. C.J. Hey, what are Executive Orders 11...? DANNY 11905 and 12333? C.J. Yeah. DANNY Making it illegal to assassinate a foreign leader. I told you it was a little about Shareef. CUT TO: INT. TOBY'S OFFICE - NIGHT Will, Toby and Josh are going over the final polishing of the speech. TOBY All right, last looks. JOSH C.J. says there are three references to "mankind." Can we make it "humankind"? TOBY Yeah. JOSH Foreign Relations would like "war" changed to "war and strife". TOBY Yeah. JOSH Where we say, "tens of billions wasted," the OMB would like us to say, "billions and billions wasted." TOBY No. JOSH Then that's all for me. TOBY [to Will] Got those? WILL Yeah. TOBY All right. Let's leave the building. What do you say? JOSH Anyone playing at Iota tonight? TOBY I don't know. Let's just go. Ask C.J. JOSH [to Will] There's that club called Iota in Arlington. They usually have some good people. You want to come out? WILL I appreciate that. I should stay here and put in the changes. JOSH Ginger or Bonnie will do that. WILL Yeah, but there are going to be notes, and I should probably be sharp tomorrow. JOSH Okay. Will goes back to his office. TOBY He's frustated with the foreign polciy section. He wanted to change it. JOSH The language? TOBY No. U.S. foreign policy. Hang on. Will? Will comes back. WILL Yeah? JOSH Listen, the President takes seriously the question of whether or not to risk American blood. WILL I'm sure he does. JOSH He can't just send people someplace. WILL I understand. Is that it? TOBY No. "Do what we can to fulfill humanity's promise." WILL You're kidding me now. TOBY No. Leadership wants to cut it. WILL Okay. Where does the President's Catholicism distinguishes between American blood and other kinds of blood? JOSH It doesn't. The voters do. The voters that you champion and that I can't stand. WILL Yeah. I'm going to put these changes in. Will exits to his office. JOSH What's his level of frustration? TOBY It's high. JOSH He's here on a temp job. He's that invested in...? CRASH! The window between Toby and Will's office shatters because Will, trying to be like Toby, has thrown a ball at it. JOSH This never happened before, has it? TOBY No. No, it hasn't. WILL Sorry. CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - NIGHT BARTLET Charlie, I'm going to change my mind again on te Bible. CHARLIE Mr. President, you have to imagine my utter surprise. BARTLET Aren't you afraid that one day I'm just going to kick your ass like it's never been kicked? CHARLIE What Bible would you prefer, sir? BARTLET Let's go with the Washington Bible. CHARLIE Well, as I said, that might be problematic to get by Sunday. BARTLET Just put it on a plane. CHARLIE The Freemasons won't let it travel by plane. BARTLET What do the Freemasons have to do with it? CHARLIE The New York Freemasons have the Bible Washington was sworn in on. It can't travel on a plane 'cause the altitude does... something. BARTLET Take a train. CHARLIE They have a rule that when the Bible travels three Freemasons have to go with it. BARTLET Buy three tickets. CHARLIE Well, it's four, 'cause you need one for the Bible, but the larger problem is... BARTLET Are you trying to tell me that Freemasons don't like me? CHARLIE Not a huge demo for you, no. But they're good people, and after all, a President is being inaugurated, so let's see what we can do. BARTLET Thank you. CHARLIE Good night, Mr. President. Bartlet exits onto the PORTICO where he runs into Leo walking out of the Outer Office. LEO Hey. BARTLET I saw C.J. smiling before. Has something good happened? LEO Yeah. BARTLET What? LEO You didn't rescind two Executive Orders. BARTLET I didn't? LEO It was an NSC Presidential Decision Directive-- it's different. BARTLET It's not different. LEO It is, and that's how I was able to look C.J. in the eye and say you didn't rescind 11905, and that's how she was able to look Danny Concannon in the eye and do the same. BARTLET Well, then it was a dodged bullet. LEO No, sir, we didn't dodge nothing. They hit what they aimed at. BARTLET Leo, come on... LEO It was a shot across the bow, it was. This guy giving it to Danny. BARTLET You're being paranoid. LEO And you're being unbelievabley naive, sir. BARTLET You think in your wildest dreams that Hutchinson's running an offense? He's that pissed that I asked for forced Depletion Report he's going to show me in Danny's byline I go to Khundu and here's what happened in Bermuda? LEO I do. In my wildest dreams, I do. BARTLET [sighs] Abbey's already gone to bed. I should get up there. LEO Hey, the Chief Justice wrote another opinion in verse. Want to hear it? BARTLET No. [starts to walk off] LEO [to Bartlet walking away.] "I say this denial is not fit for trial." BARTLET [yells back] Good night. LEO Thank you, Mr. President. CUT TO: INT. THE PRESIDENT'S PRIVATE STUDY - NIGHT Bartlet walks in and puts his breifcase down. He notices Abbey has fallen asleep in a chair while reading a book. He walks over to her. BARTLET Abbey. No response. BARTLET Abigail. No response. BARTLET Abbey, the kids are eating sugar. She wakes up. ABBEY Oh. BARTLET How you doing? You know I gave the kids candy all the time, right? ABBEY Behind my back? BARTLET Yes. ABBEY You bought their love. BARTLET Well, it was for sale, and I wanted it. ABBEY Come to bed. BARTLET I'm going to stay up for a bit and read and watch some news. ABBEY Okay. Tony's grandkids are in there watching a movie. It may still be in there. I think he has a... Laurel and Hardy movie. BARTLET His grandkids were in here? ABBEY For a while. We had to move them because.... What do you care right now? BARTLET I don't. ABBEY Come to bed soon. BARTLET For the record... ABBEY Yeah. BARTLET Frederick the Great told his generals... to defend everything is to defend nothing. ABBEY And? BARTLET I don't really know what that means, do you? ABBEY No. But I'm mostly asleep right now, and also I don't know what you're talking about. BARTLET Well, that makes two of us. ABBEY Who made you crazy? Not that someone has to make you that way. BARTLET I'll be in soon. ABBEY You gave the girls candy? BARTLET I was their dealer. Live with it. ABBEY Come to bed. [leaves] CUT TO: INT. CLUB IOTA - NIGHT C.J., Toby and Josh are sitting down at a table. Jill Sobule is on stage performing "Heroes." JILL SOBULE "Why are all our heroes so imperfect? Why do they always bring me down?" C.J. [to waiter] Tank and tonic. JOSH Uh, two. Cynthia, I left a message for Donna. She might call. WAITER CYNTHIA Sure. JILL "The statue in the park has lost his crown. William Faulkner, drunk..." C.J. The guy across the street is beating up a pregnant woman. You don't go over and try and stop it? TOBY Guy across the street is beating up anybody, I like to think I go over and try to stop it, but we're not talking about the President going to Asia or the President going to Rwanda or the President going to Qumar. We're talking about the Preisdent sending other people's kids to do that. C.J. That's always what we're talking about, and in addition to being somebody's kids, they're soldiers and sailors, and if we're about freedom from tyranny, then we're about freedom from tyranny, and if we're not, we should shut up. JOSH Yes. TOBY Back at the office, you were telling Will... C.J. He said that to Will 'cause that's what we say. TOBY You were't even there. C.J. It's what we always say. TOBY On Sunday, he's taking an oath to ensure domestic tranquilty. C.J. And to establish justice and promote the general welfare. Stand by while atrocities are taking place, and you're an accomplice. TOBY I'm not indifferent to that, but knuckleheaded self-destruction is never going to burn itself out, you really want to send your kids across the street into the fire? C.J. Want to? No. Should I? Yes. TOBY Why? And don't give me a lefty answer. C.J. A lefty answer is all I've got. TOBY Why are you sending your kids across the street? JILL "William Faulkner, drunk and depressed, Tennesse Wiiliams, drunk and depressed..." C.J. 'Cause those are somebody's kids, too. CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - NIGHT Bartlet is reading. He places the folder down and rubs his eyes. He sees the TVs in front of him and grabs the remote. He turns on the first TV shich shows a tank exiting a ship. He mutes that TV and turns on another which shows a Ron Popeil informercial. He mutes that TV and turns on a another TV that is giving weather report on Washington. He mutes that TV and turns on a fourth TV and presses play on the VCR. "Get some more dots." "You know what?" "What?" "The wooden soldiers." Bartlet hits the rewind button and plays it agian. "You know what?" "What?" "The wooden soldiers." Bartlet leans closer to the TV and watches as the wooden soldiers begin to march. He glances up at the first TV which is showing real soldiers marching. He keeps looking back and forth between the two TV's showing the real and wooden soldiers, then he picks up the phone and presses a button. WOMAN Yes, Mr. President? BARTLET Leo McGarry, please. WOMAN Right away, sir. FADE OUT. END ACT ONE * * * ACT TWO FADE IN: INT. CLUB IOTA - NIGHT Josh and Toby are sitting at table talking. Jlll Sobule is on stage performing "Rock me to Sleep." JILL "Rock me to sleep, Rock me to sleep, I wish I had somebody to rock me to sleep." JOSH I'm not talking about fighting two wars at once, I'm not talking about fighting wars. Intervening when there's violence against people who are defenseless... TOBY Fine, but if we go here, then that means they can go there, and look, there's more injustice over there. JOSH We elect these people. And not for nothing, but if'd had been the world's policemen in the 30's, you and I... TOBY We would have had a lot more relatives. JOSH That's right. JILL "Of the sycamore tree..." JOSH Where the hell is Donna? TOBY Leave her alone-- she's having a last night with... What's his name? JOSH I called her at Jack's, and I paged her. TOBY Leave her alone. C.J. comes running back to the table. C.J. I've got to bo back to the office. JOSH What happened? C.J. [putting on her coat] Danny screwed me, and somebody on one of our staffs screwed the rest of us. C.J. walks off. Josh and Toby's cellphones and pagers begin to go off. TOBY I'll get the call. [to phone] This is Toby. CHARLIE [on phone] You got to come in. It's the speech. TOBY We're on our way. CHARLIE He wants you to bring Will Bailey, too. You want to call him or you want me to? TOBY Well, Will's never been called in the middle of the night by the office of the President. I think he should experience that before he leaves. JOSH Definitely. CUT TO: EXT. CAPITOL BUILDING - NIGHT We pan down from the Capitol Building to a sign that says "Holiday Inn." CUT TO: INT. HOTEL ROOM - CONTINUOUS Will is lying asleep in bed when the telephone rings. He puts on his glasses and reaches for them when his cellphone starts to ring. He goes and picks up his cellphone. WILL [into cellphone] Just a second, please. He starts to pick up the phone, when someone starts banging on the door. He jumps up and runs to the door. The man yells through the door. MAN [VO] Mr. Bailey, it's the night manager. There's a phone call for you. WILL Uh, yeah. He jumps back across the bed and grabs the phone. WOMAN Mr. Bailey, this is the White Hoouse operator. WILL Yes, ma'am. WOMAN Would you hold, please, I have a call for you from Charlie Young. Will's pager starts vibrating and he picks it up. It reads "POTUS". CUT TO: INT. LOBBY - NIGHT C.J. comes bursting through the entrance by the Press Room where Danny is waiting. They start yelling over each other. DANNY This is not what happened. C.J. I don't believe this. DANNY Listen to me. C.J. This is, A] it was garbage. That was... that was totally out of left field on the piece on the unnamed White House source... DANNY It wasn't mine. C.J. What do you mean, it wasn't yours? DANNY It got dropped in. C.J. Who dropped it in? DANNY My editor and my researhcer. C.J. They dropped it in? DANNY Yes. C.J. Without your knowledge? DANNY Yes. C.J. And you're okay with that? DANNY How do I sound?! They reach C.J.'S OFFICE. C.J. What was the name of the researcher? DANNY Oh, you're not... C.J. No, the researchers looking out for his future. He's twenty-three and times a-wastin'. I want to give him a Lexus. What's his name? DANNY C.J.. C.J. What's his name?! DANNY That's going to stay between me and my boss. The reseachers talked to three different people on background-- just nuts and bolts. C.J. Asking how many nuts and bolts doesn't get this quote. DANNY As a matter of form, he's tell them what I'm writing about. C.J., I don't know who he talked to. C.J. I sent you to Donna when you asked... DANNY I'm saying it wasn't necessarily Donna. I mean, in a million years, do you think Donna... C.J. No, but that day, yesterday, her boyfriend Jack Reese, a Navy Lieutenant Commander, was reassigned from a White House poistion, and she was very angry about it. DANNY Sometimes people say something to a researcher 'cause they think they're not on the record. C.J. They're not on the record! DANNY No. Carol enters the office. CAROL C.J.? C.J. Yeah? CAROL It's Donna on the phone. Danny walks out and C.J. picks up the phone as she watches Danny leave through her window. CUT TO: INT. OUTER OVAL OFFICE - NIGHT Josh and Toby are leaning up against the desk waiting. JOSH Well. This is gonna, I think, get interesting now. TOBY Yes. JOSH This is gonna get interesting. TOBY It will capture our interest... JOSH ...and will be written about... TOBY ...in English, I would think as well as... JOSH Arabic? TOBY You can say that two times. I suppose you can't blame Will completely. Will enters. WILL Hi. TOBY This is entirely your fault. WILL He came in the office. TOBY You like Europe. He likes Europe. You could have talked about Europe. WILL That wasn't the subject. TOBY Than make it the subject. He says, "here's this El Salvador speech I gave a long time ago," and you say? WILL 'I like Europe?' TOBY Yes. C.J. enters. C.J. Listen, something's happened. TOBY What? C.J. A White House aide is quoted in tomorrow's Post. Charlie exits the Oval Office. CHARLIE You can go in. C.J. All right. Toby, Will, Josh and C.J. enter THE OVAL OFFICE where Bartlet and Leo are wating. BARTLET We're for freedom of speech everywhere. We're for freedom to worship everywhere. We're for freedom to learn... for everybody. And because, in our time, you can build a bomb in your country and bring it to my country, what goes on in you country is very much my business. And so we are for freedom from tyranny everywhere, whether in the guise of political oppresion, Toby, or economic slavery, Josh, or religious fanaticism, C.J. That most fundamental idea cannot be met with merely our support. It has to be met with our strength. Diplomatically, economically, materially. And if pharoah still don't free the slaves, then he gets the plagues, or my cavalry, whichever gets there first. The USTR will go crazy and say that we're not considering global trade. Committee members will go crazy and say I haven't consulted enough. And the Arab world will just go indescriminately crazy. No country has ever had a doctrine of intervention when only humanitarian interests were at stake. That streaks going to end Sunday at noon. So, if you're on board with this, what I need you to do... By now, Josh, Toby and Will have begun talking. C.J. has gotten on her cellphone, and they're not listening to Bartlet. TOBY What we're going to do is comb through the language again, this time with counsel. C.J. [to cellphone] Carol? It's me. I'm going to need new talking points for the full Cabinet, no embargoed excepts... TOBY We have to move from a lone rogue, to a posse. BARTLET [to Leo] Do I just keep standing here? LEO No. [to the gang] Excuse me! They stop talking and turn around. LEO It is so ordered. ALL Thank you, Mr. President. They all exit. CUT TO: INT. OUTER OVAL OFFICE - CONTINUOUS TOBY All right, everything else off the table. [to C.J.] What were you going to say before? WILL I'm going to be on the phone. [exits] C.J. Danny's got a piece out tomorrow on fault lines between the White House and the Pentagon. TOBY He writes that story twice a year. C.J. A researcher gathering background spoke to three people, one of whom was Donna, because your office is one of the places that keeps breakdowns of how Pentagon staff are detailed to the White House. The researcher was giving an unprompted quote, which he gave to Danny's editor, who put it in the piece. JOSH What was the quote? C.J. Everyone's very loyal to everyone else around here, unless you wear a uniform. JOSH I know it sounds like it was Donna 'cause of the situation with Jack, but there's no way she gives that quote to a reporter. C.J. She didn't think she was on the record. JOSH There's no way Donna said that. C.J. She did. She just called me and told me she did, which I give her credit for. JOSH You do? TOBY Heat of the moment. And bad timing. JOSH I don't have time for this now. [to C.J.] Neither do you. They exit. CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - NIGHT Bartlet has poured himself a drink and is filling another glass up with water. BARTLET "Set free the oppressed, break every yoke, clothe the naked and your light shall break forth like the dawn, and the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard." He hands Leo the drink of water. LEO Ten minutes ago, you promised me you'd go easy on the Moses references. BARTLET That was Isaiah. LEO Still. They frighten people? BARTLET Who? LEO Me. BARTLET Well, then here's to swimmin' with bow-legged women. LEO Ah, that tastes like... nothing at all. It has no taste or properties of any kind. You can expect to see pieces quoting Pentagon sources on how many lives we'd lose in Khundu. And a search and rescue group, diving for a lost helicopter prop, is going to find a piece of a Gulfstream. BARTLET I think you're wrong. But if you're right, then okay. We should all have a little skin in this. LEO Well, then, that much we've accomplished. BARTLET So we're doing well so far. LEO Sunday noon? BARTLET Sunday noon. LEO Thank you, Mr. President. CUT TO: EXT. CAPITOL BUILDING - DAY UNITED STATES CAPITOL SUNDAY INAUGURATION DAY The Presidential motorcade is riding down Pennsylvania Avenue towrds the Capitol. There is a small crowd of spectators. CUT TO: INT. LIMOUSINE - CONTINUOUS ABBEY Because of Laurel and Hardy? BARTLET Not because, no. Not because of Laurel and Hardy. That was simply the confluence of the final, you know, and... also, by the way, from the mouths of babe-- like yourself. Seriously, from the mouths of babes and clowns come-- Listen, there's no reason why anyone needs to know about Laurel and Hardy. ABBEY Sounds like that's going to depend a lot on my general mood. BARTLET Too cold for a parade. Bunch of tanned-ass Southerners. ABBEY That decision was made by your Inauguration Chariman, who's from Massachusetts. BARTLET Which is to the south of New Hampshire. Don't tell me geographic stereotypes. ABBEY You would've been happy walking up Pennsylvania Avenue in this cold? BARTLET I walked to school every morning in weather colder than this. ABBEY From the headmaster's house to your classroom. BARTLET That's right, baby. Just a camel hair coat, leather gloves, a varsity scarf and these wits. The motorcade pulls into an UNDERGROUND PARKING LOT. Charlie meets Bartlet getting out. They begin a walk-and-talk with Ed, Larry, and other staffers in tow. CHARILE Sir. BARTLET It's here? CHARLIE No, sir. BARTLET What is the problem? It was in New York. It could have gotten here on a fast horse. CHARLIE They took the Metroliner this morning. BARTLET And? CHARLIE The train's stuck in Philadelphia. BARTLET Because? CHARLIE Frozen tracks. BARTLET And it didn't come in last night... CHARLIE ...because the Inaugural Committee wouldn't pay for four hotel rooms. BARTLET Three for the freemasons and one for the Bible. CHARLIE I guess the Bible doesn't get a room. Three hotel rooms. BARTLET Three hotel rooms and four train tickets. CHARLIE Yeah. BARTLET Okay. You know what? Washington didn't bring his own Bible, he just assumed one would be provided, which, frankly, isn't unreasonable. Guy wants you to swear an oath on a Bible, he ought to be packing a Bible. Washington had someone get one from across the street. CHARLIE [to Ed and Larry] Excuse me, what are the chances there's a Bible in the House Library? LARRY They should have one. ED Yeah, they got one. CHARLIE Excuse me, sir. [runs off] BARTLET Just common courtesy I think. "Place your hand on this Bible." And, "Oh, can I use your Bible?" That's not right. CUT TO: INT. CAPITOL BUILDING - CONTINUOUS C.J. walks up to Bartlet and the gang. C.J. Good morning, Mr. President. BARTLET Why are they talking to me about the order of the balls? C.J. Political Affairs thinks it's important. LARRY They'd like you to start with the Plain States, followed by the Rust Belt Ball, then the one from the Pacific Northwest. ED It says you're President of the whole country. C.J. Aren't we about to demonstrate that pretty clearly? LARRY He could start with the New Hampshire Ball... The entourage continues to talk as we pan to Toby who is standing in a hallway alone. He watches C.J. kiss Bartlet on the cheek. Will comes out of bathroom wiping his mouth. TOBY Did you throw up? WILL Yeah. TOBY About time. WILL It was my third time. TOBY Still. C.J. comes walking up. C.J. They're yuckling him about the order of the balls. They go silent and you can hear a band playing. C.J. That's the U.S. Marine Corps Band right there. The Commandant's Own. These guys practice four hours a day. So you think the Chief Justice has lost his mind. TOBY I didn't say he's "lost his mind," I said... I said he lost his mind and Leo said he's lost his mind. C.J. Leo's lost his mind. TOBY Speaking in verse... C.J. A literary curse. [looking at watch] Five minutes. Josh comes walking up. JOSH He doesn't have a Bible. Charlie's out looking for one. C.J. Should I be...? JOSH Charlie'll get it. Charlie comes running by with a bible in his hands. CHARLIE I've got it. C.J. So there it is. Let's see what happens now. They watch Charlie as he runs down the hallway with the Bible. FADE OUT. END ACT TWO * * * ACT THREE FADE IN: INT. BALLROOM - DAY A band is playing an up-tempo jazz song. People are on the dance floor swing dancing. Toby is surrounded by a group of ladies. They are laughing. Leo is across the room looking at Toby. Toby leaves the group of women and walks over to Leo. They hug. LEO Listen. Will did a great a job, and I like him personally too. But he had a meeting with that Public Affairs guy, and people at State are focusing a lot of displeasure on him. TOBY I told him to have a bad meeting with that Public Affairs guy. LEO I know, and I want to use him again, but I need friends at State right now, so I want him to work under the radar. He should work out of his house and deal with us by phone. TOBY That's exactly what I was going to say. LEO Yeah? TOBY Except the part about him working under the radar in his house on the phone. Leo, I want the President to appoint him Deputy. LEO Are you sure? TOBY I can talk to the people at State and-- LEO I don't care about State. I'm asking... are you sure? TOBY Yeah. LEO You don't mean on an interim basis? TOBY No. LEO What about Sam? TOBY A promotion-- it's well past time. Make him a Senior Counselor, take the knucklehead stuff off his desk, the way he did for me for four years. Let him concentrate on the President and the country. LEO I'll advise the President. Toby walks away from Leo. Leo starts to smile and bop his head to the music. Across the ballroom, Danny is weaving his way through the dancers on the floor. He spots Josh. DANNY Hey! JOSH Hey. DANNY Congratulations. This is something. Sorry about the story yesterday. JOSH It wasn't your fault. DANNY Where is she? JOSH Donna? DANNY Yeah. JOSH She's sitting in her apartment in a ball gown. DANNY Waiting for a ball to come over? JOSH She doesn't think it's appropriate for her to be here. I couldn't talk her down. DANNY How hard you try? JOSH I tried hard. DANNY She didn't think she was on the record. I'm not sure if my editor knew that one. JOSH It doesn't matter. DANNY Yeah. I thought the balance of the piece was-- JOSH I haven't read it. Sorry. I haven't. DANNY I have a copy here if you want to... He reaches in his pocket and pulls out the article. JOSH You're walking around with a copy of it? DANNY Well, I think parts of it are pretty good. Hey, when you won a Fulbright Scholarship you taped the letter to your face. JOSH Give me that. [grabs the article and reads] Yeah, here it is. "Said one White House aide, 'We've got a situation--'" DANNY The point was to actually read all the other parts. JOSH "...'where the White House won't give the D.O.D an extra ten billion so they have to go to the Hill and get it.' Said the same aide, "Everybody's very loyal around here unless you wear a uniform,'" said the same aide. I hadn't read the first part of the quote. Said the same aide? I'm going to kill her. CUT TO: EXT. RESIDENTIAL STREET - NIGHT A cab is driving down a residential street. The street is blanket with snow. The cab stops and Josh, Toby, Charlie, Will and Danny get out. TOBY [to cab driver] Why don't you stick around for a minute. [to Josh] We're just going to be a minute, right? JOSH Quick review. TOBY [to cab driver] Wait just one minute. JOSH It's good cop/bad cop. I'm the good cop; the four of you are the bad cop. Will, what are you? WILL The bad cop. JOSH Danny what are you? DANNY The bad cop. JOSH Toby, what are you? TOBY Hurry up. JOSH Charlie, who are you? CHARLIE I love Zoey, and I must have her back. JOSH The bad cop, that's right. Here we go. Josh runs up to the door of the building. The rest are still standing in the middle of the road. WILL That's great news about Zoey. I didn't meet her, but I bet she's nice. CHARLIE Not really, but my love for her knows no bounds. DANNY Charlie, aren't you cold without a coat? CHARLIE I took off my coat to show my love for Zoey. DANNY Wow. CHARLIE I'd take off my shirt too, but it's inappropriate with a tuxedo. DANNY Not if we're at Chipendales. TOBY [to Josh] I'm standing here! JOSH [coming back down the steps] The buzzer's not working. TOBY Did you try it? JOSH No, I divined it. DANNY Maybe she's just not answering. JOSH The buzzer's not working. There's a note that says the buzzer's not working. TOBY Call her. JOSH No, I know women. I know what they're like. [yelling] Donna! DANNY I think before tonight's over, we might have ourselves a whole new story. Toby starts to laugh. Josh picks up some snow and makes a snowball. He hurls it at her window, but he misses. JOSH Huh. He makes another snowball and misses. The others follow suit. They are now all throwing snowballs at Donna's window. DANNY Ho! TOBY Yeah! JOSH Here we go. They finally hit the window and Donna appears. She lifts up her window but they continue to throw snowballs, almost hitting her. DONNA What the hell are you doing? JOSH Get down here! Now! DONNA Keep your voice down. JOSH Don't even think about telling me to keep my voice! Get down here! DONNA I'm coming. Donna puts down her window and disappears. A neighbor from across the street has opened his window and yells down at them. MAN 1 Hey, now I'm telling you-- keep your voice down. MAN 2 Me too. JOSH Oh, no, I'm sorry. Didn't mean to wake you guys. Uh, this is a special situation. It's okay, I'm the good cop. TOBY [into cellphone] Hi, National Inquirer? Donna comes walking out of her house. Josh runs up to her taking off his coat. JOSH You come down here without a coat? DONNA I need you to keep your voice down. Josh puts his coat around Donna. DONNA Go ahead, you're entitled-- give it to me all again. JOSH You don't know the White House rejected ten billion for the D.O.D. You have absolutely no way of knowing that. Jack said it. The researcher called Jack, and Jack said it. DONNA He was working a lot of nights, and it really wore him out. JOSH Yeah? DONNA And then this thing happened, and he didn't think he was on the record. JOSH Donna-- DONNA He didn't, Josh. That was legitimate. JOSH He's letting you take credit for this? DONNA Listen, this guys got an important career ahead of him. JOSH Your career isn't important? What was the point of anyone claiming... You knew it was easy... to figure out it was him. DONNA Not as easy as you made it. I didn't think about the top of the quote-- JOSH The list of things you didn't think about, including your job, what the President thinks of you. DONNA Does he know about this? JOSH He's about to. You look amazing. DONNA [to the guys still standing in the street] Hi, guys. WILL, CHARLIE and DANNY Hi, Donna. TOBY Donna. DONNA Sorry about all this. TOBY Don't worry about it. DANNY It was stupid, but it was menschy. JOSH [to Danny] Hey, hey, hey. Good cop/bad cop. DANNY Sorry, it was just stupid. DONNA Hey, Will, you and Toby wrote maybe the greatest speech I've ever heard. WILL Thank you very much. JOSH [to Donna] We're going to a ball. DONNA Balls are fun. JOSH We're actually going to eight of them. DONNA Eight times the fun. JOSH I was actually the one who hit the window, the rest of them went to school on my throw. TOBY Let's go! Josh puts out his arm and Donna grabs it. They all begin to walk to the cab. DONNA How you doing, Charlie? CHARLIE Well, I'm going to win Zoey's heart from Jean-Paul. DONNA Excellent. CHARLIE 'Cause he may be good-looking and rich and well schooled and French royalty, you know, and live basically in a castle, but... Oh, God. TOBY This is what I've been telling you. Get in the car. Everyone is now in the cab but Donna and Josh. DONNA Josh... I'm sorry. Seriously, I've never lied to you before, boss, and it won't happen again. JOSH You're going to have to sit on somebody's lap. DONNA Okay. Josh and Donna start to get in the cab. FADE OUT. END ACT THREE * * * ACT FOUR FADE IN: INT. BALLROOM - NIGHT The band is playing a slow jazz song. People are are on the dance floor dancing. C.J. and Leo are at a bar getting handed drinks from the bar tender. LEO [to bar tender] Thank you. C.J. You should expect increased voices of dissent after today - in breadth and depth. LEO A ship in the harbor is safe, but that's not what ships were build for. C.J. It's doubtful Danny's inquiries about Shareef would have gone further if he didn't have new sources at the Pentagon. LEO So what? C.J. Really? LEO You know what the decision directives say? That diplomats and leaders aren't immune from being targets when they're connected to terrorist activities that threaten the U.S. or its citizens. I don't think it's an unusual directive. C.J. That it was given hours before Shareef's plane disappeared... Just a reminder, the more I know, the more I can help you. And don't be concerned with my exposure. I'm not your daughter. I'm the White House Press Secretary. Charlie walks up. CHARLIE The President would like you both. CUT TO: INT. PRIVATE ROOM - NIGHT Toby, C.J., Leo, Will, Josh, Donna, and Abbey are all waiting in a room when Bartlet and Charlie walk in. BARTLET Good evening. ALL Good evening, Mr. President. Bartlet walks over to Abbey who kisses him on the cheek, then she wipes the lipstick on his cheek off. BARTLET Everything all right? TOBY Yes, sir. BARTLET They're saying I'm rewriting the Constitution on the back of a napkin. They're saying on FOX that a guy who couldn't run a local sheriff's department wants to send troops around the world. They're saying it's liberalism with a grenade launcher. But they're not saying it was badly written, so that's something. And they sure as hell know I was serious, so that's something else. Congratulations, folks. We've got ourselves a doctrine. They applaud. BARTLET Will, I think some of these people don't know who your dad is. Will's the youngest son of Tom Bailey, who's the only guy in the world with a better title than mine. He was Supreme Commander, NATO Allied Forces Europe. We didn't know we were going to do this. I would have asked you to invite him. WILL Well, you got quite a response from him watching on TV, sir. I think he's going to reenlist. BARTLET Actually, I meant he could be here now when I tell you Toby's asked me to commission you as his deputy. WILL I'm sorry, sir? BARTLET Toby wants to make you deputy. WILL Pardon me? BARTLET I'm appointing you Deputy Communications Director. It covers a wide range of areas of policy and execution and counsel to me. WILL To you... the President? BARTLET Yes. WILL I'm sorry, sir. I'm not following-- are you... LEO Good God, boy. JOSH I remeber when you named me Deputy, there was a dull buzzing in my ear, or a humming. It was very disorienting. C.J. The same thing happened to me. JOSH Hang in there Will, you're doing fine. DONNA [in Josh's ear] That was a nice story about the buzzing. JOSH What did I say about speaking to me without addressing me as Wild Thing. BARTLET [to Will] Excuse me? Will looks. BARTLET Hi. [motions Will to come closer] Sam's going to be promoted to Senior Counselor if he loses the 47th. WILL I don't know what to say. BARTLET [to the gang] That's what you want to hear from your new Communications-- WILL I-I accept. BARTLET There's a promise that I ask everyone who works here to make. Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful and commited citizens can change the world. You know why? WILL It's the only thing that ever has. BARTLET William Bailey, reposing special trust and confidence in your integrety, prudence and ability, I designate you to the post of Deputy White House Director of Communications and Special Assistant to the President. And I do authorize you to execute and fulfill the duties of that office with all the powers and privileges and subject to the conditions prescribed. It is affirmed by my signature... Charlie hands Bartlet a Certificate and a pen. Bartlet signs the certificate and hands the pen to Will. BARTLET ...and affixed with the Seal of of the Unites States. Charlie hands bartlet a stamp. Bartlet stamps the certificate. BARTLET And it is done so on this day and in this place. He hands the certificate to Will. BARTLET Congratulations. They clap for Will. He goes around and shakes all of their hands. BARTLET [holding a piece of paper in his hand] You know, it's easy to watch the news and think of Khundunese as either hapless victims or crazed butchers, and it turns out that's not true. I got this intelligence summary this afternoon. "Mothers are standing in front of tanks." And we're going to go get their backs. An hour ago, I ordered Fitzwallace to have UCOMM deploy a brigade of the 82nd Airborne, the 101st Air Assualt, and a Marine Expeditionary Unit to Khundu to stop the violence. The 101st are the Screaming Eagles. The Marines are with the 22nd M.E.U., trained at Camp Lejuene, some of them very recently. I'm sorry, everyone, but this is a work night. Bartlet grabs Abbey's hand, and they all walk out of the room. Will is still standing there. LEO That's you too. WILL I know. Will walks out of the room. CUT TO: INT. BALLROOM - CONTINUOUS Two Secret Service agents open the doors as Bartlet and Abbey walk out together followed by C.J. and Toby, Charlie, Josh and Donna, Will, then Leo. Headed for the front door, they cut through the dance floor as people are dancing. DISSOLVE TO: END TITLES. FADE TO BLACK. THE END * * * The West Wing and all its characters are a property of Aaron Sorkin, John Wells Production, Warner Brothers Television and NBC. No copyright infringement is intended. Episode 4.15 -- "Inauguration part 2: Over There" Original Air Date: February 12, 2003, 9:00 PM EST Transcribed by: ck1czar March 5, 2003