THE WEST WING "BARTLET'S THIRD STATE OF THE UNION" TELEPLAY BY: AARON SORKIN STORY BY: ALLISON ABNER & DEE DEE MYERS DIRECTED BY: CHRISTOPHER MISIANO TEASER FADE IN: INT. OUTER OVAL OFFICE - NIGHT THE WEST WING 8:54 P.M. Staffers, including Mrs. Landingham, quickly move through the office. Sam paces nervously, waiting on the phone. REPORTER [on T.V.] We are, by my watch, six minutes away from President Bartlet’s entrance onto the floor of the House of Representatives. This is his third State of the Union Address. The familiar introduction by the Doorkeeper of the House, Edgar Finney. Perhaps some people don’t know that in order for the President to address Congress, he must first receive permission from the Speaker... SAM [into phone] I’m still here. [glances at his watch] All right. [pause] Is that a yes? Is it a yes? Toby and Ginger rush by. TOBY Sam... SAM [to Toby] Be half a minute. Toby and Ginger exit to THE OVAL OFFICE. Leo and a crowd of staffers are standing inside. TOBY Mr. Pettit? MR. PETTIT Yeah. TOBY Delete 'vigorously' from the first sentence. LEO Which paragraph? TOBY 367. LARRY We’re not going to vigorously pursue campaign finance reform? TOBY No, we’re just gonna pursue it regularly. ED No vigorously. [crosses it out] TOBY Not tonight. [to Leo] McGowan says we’re fine. He feels the word 'vigorous' is inflammatory. [to staffers] Change chokehold to tight grip. BONNIE Is that it? ED Yeah. TOBY No, Sam’s still on it. LARRY We got like four minutes, Toby. Bartlet enters, rolling down his sleeves. Charlie follows. BARTLET Where are we? LEO Sam’s still on. BARTLET Bob Novak just said this was the speech of my political life. You know how many times I’ve heard that? TOBY Sir, Senator McGowan say’s we’re fine if we cut 'vigorously.' BARTLET Do it. LEO How you feeling? BARTLET Good. Bartlet looks nervous as Charlie helps him on with his suit jacket. BARTLET Abbey’s already in her seat? CHARLIE Yes sir. BARTLET [to Charlie] I said, my wife’s in her seat? CHARLIE Yes sir. LARRY We got four minutes. LEO We’ll get him in the car. Let’s go. Bartlet looks up and follows Leo out. LARRY Here we go. The crowd follows Bartlet out to the OUTER OVAL OFFICE. SAM [into phone] I’m gonna tell him it’s a yes. [pumps fist in air] Thank you. [hangs up as they walk by] LEO What did they say? SAM [joins the crowd] We put our weight behind Sp 380. It’s a highway improvement bill. They all walk out to the HALLWAY. LEO What else? SAM Set aside some U.S. park land... LEO What else? SAM That’s it. LEO I want to be clear. This is the understanding we build him a highway and name a park after him and we have the support for the Blue Ribbon? SAM Yep. LEO Mr. President... BARTLET Do it. TOBY Ginger! GINGER Yeah? TOBY Tell C.J. the green light on the Blue Ribbon. She’ll know what it means. GINGER Yes sir. [takes off] SAM [to Toby] We’ll write in the car! The crowd exits to the NORTH ENTRANCE. Several limousines are parked in a motorcade. Sam and Toby walk to the front limo. LEO Sir... BARTLET Yeah. LEO It’s a good thing. BARTLET The Blue Ribbon... LEO Yeah. BARTLET Yeah. Leo, Bartlet and Charlie enter the middle car. The rest of the them enter the rear car. CUT TO: INT. NATIONAL STRATEGIES GROUP - NIGHT NATIONAL STRATEGIES GROUP 8:57 P.M. Josh paces nervously in a room full of computers and phones. He spies a phone pollster. JOSH Excuse me... What are you doing? FEMALE CALLER I’m just... JOSH You were putting gum in your mouth? FEMALE CALLER Yeah, cause that’s what I... JOSH 'Cause that’s a good idea to be chewing gum when you’re taking a poll for the President of the United States. That’s the sound people like to hear over the phone. MALE CALLER The poling hasn’t started yet. JOSH Well, thank you... Mr. Helper. Donna walks by, rescuing the callers. DONNA Josh. JOSH Yeah. DONNA [smiling] These people have done this before. JOSH They’re not our people. DONNA They’re Joey Lucas’ people. JOSH None of them have accents? DONNA They’re all out of the Midwest. JOSH I’m saying Joey Lucas is deaf. She would have NO way of knowing... DONNA Josh... JOSH [suddenly turns, yelling] Do any of you people have accents? DONNA Oh my God... Donna turns away embarrassed. The crowd stares at Josh. JOSH Do any of you people have the power of speech? DONNA They’re fine. Josh turns away and nervously looks at his watch. JOSH I should be there right now. He walks off with Donna in tow. DONNA He’s fine! CUT TO: EXT. WASHINGTON DC STREET- NIGHT The motorcade rushes down the street flanked by Police escort. LEO [VO] Therefore I am asking the leaders of Congress... CUT TO INT. PRESIDENTIAL LIMO - NIGHT Leo is on the phone. LEO [into phone] "...the members of both parties to join me in establishing a Blue Ribbon National Commission to fashion..." BARTLET [nodding] Yeah. LEO [into phone] I want it for him when he walks in the door. MARK [VO] Gail Schumer, should we expect the White House to be doing... CUT TO INT. PRESS ROOM - NIGHT Several reporters mill around the Press Room. Through the partition we see C.J. conducting a briefing to a room full of reporters. MARK [VO] ...it’s own polling? SCHUMER [VO] You’d better believe it. This may well be the speech of the President’s political life. C.J. Excuse me. I’ve got a heads up! There’ll be a last minute addition. CUT TO: INT. BRIEFING ROOM - NIGHT 8:59 P.M. C.J. The President will be announcing a bipartisan Blue Ribbon Commission to study the long-term future Entitlement Programs. Obviously there will be more details in the address. REPORTER 1 Why last minute? C.J. You know when I say 'last minute' I’m wrong. We’re just under three minutes. REPORTER 2 C.J.... why last minute? C.J. It’s something he’s been going back and forth on. He wanted to make sure he had the support of the Democratic leadership. REPORTER 2 And he does? C.J. Yes. I also wanted to remind you that "Capital Beat" will be broadcasting live from the West Wing for the two or three hours following the address so that area is gonna be off limits for carousing. REPORTER 1 Capital Beat is doing live post game from the White House? C.J. Yes. REPORTER 2 So why do they get special treatment? C.J. Because they’re special. Enjoy the show everybody. [exits] CUT TO: EXT. CAPITOL BUILDING - NIGHT THE CAPITOL 9:00 P.M. TOBY [VO] Those of us in the future will demand boldly putting aside our partisan... CUT TO: INT. CAPITOL HALLWAY - NIGHT Toby and Sam are hunched over a counter in the hallway. TOBY ...blunders and abandoning our ideological... what? SAM Entrenchment. TOBY Those of us in the future will demand boldly putting aside our partisan blinders and abandoning our ideological... entrenchment. SAM Yeah. TOBY [sighs] That’s it. SAM Okay. TOBY This is it. SAM Yeah. Sam hands the copy to a staffer. TOBY [sighs] Phone it to the Prompter. The staffer walks down the hall and pauses to speak into his cell phone. As he does, the Presidential Entourage passes. CHARLIE Mr. President. Bartlet stoops to tie his shoelaces. Sam, Toby and Leo glance at each other nervously. TOBY Mr. President. Toby hands Bartlet the speech in a leather portfolio. BARTLET Thanks. Bartlet shakes Toby and Sam's hands. Staffers applaud as the group walks down the HALLWAY to the chambers. Bartlet tries to hide his nervousness. At the ENTRANCE to the chambers stands an elderly gentleman. They nod to each other. FINNEY Sir. Bartlet pauses, bows his head and prays. BARTLET [crossing himself] Amen. CHARLIE Amen. BARTLET Mr. Finney, would you tell the Speaker I’d like to see him please? Mr. Finney nods then turns and enters the chamber. We hear the murmur of the crowd and the sound of the gavel... FINNEY [OS] Mr. Speaker... The President of the United States! Bartlet enters the chamber leaving Sam, Toby, and Leo standing proudly. SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES. END TEASER * * * ACT ONE FADE IN: EXT. WASHINGTON D.C. - NIGHT BARTLET [VO] ...continue to rise through every age... CUT TO: INT. NATIONAL STRATEGIES GROUP - NIGHT Josh and Donna sit on a stairway watching the address on a monitor. They are surrounded by callers. BARTLET [on T.V.] ...against every challenge, of people of great works and greater possibilities who have always, always found the wisdom and strength to come together as one nation; to widen the circle of opportunity, to deepen the meaning of our freedom, to form a more perfect union. Our best days lie ahead. God bless you and God bless the United States of America! The crowd erupts into applause. Josh stands, hollering and clapping. Donna stands smiling. JOSH [to Donna] Tell me about it. DONNA He was brilliant up there. JOSH Up there is where this President eats! That is his place of business. Yes, he did well. Josh and Donna walk down the STAIRS to the main floor. DONNA Yeah. JOSH Let’s find out how well. DONNA This is exciting. JOSH Yeah. DONNA Yeah. JOSH So, what do I do? DONNA What do you mean? JOSH What do I tell them? DONNA Tell them to start JOSH Didn’t you talk to Joey? DONNA Yeah. JOSH What did she say? DONNA She said her plane was late. JOSH [confused] What did she say I should tell the callers? DONNA She didn’t say anything. JOSH Donna! DONNA Tell them to start, Josh. JOSH They’re not supposed to receive special instructions based on... DONNA What? JOSH Time zones!? I don’t know. I’m... I’m not a pollster. I thought Joey called. DONNA She called from the plane and said she was late. JOSH When is she gonna be here? JOEY [KENNY] Joshua Lyman, you have the cutest little butt in professional politics. Josh turns to find Joey standing with a big grin on her face. Next to her is her interpreter, Kenny. JOSH Kenny, really, that better had been her talking. JOEY [KENNY] I’m here. JOSH Where the hell you been? JOEY [KENNY] My plane had mechanical difficulties. JOSH This is the State of the Union. There was nothing you could do about it? JOEY [KENNY] No. Because as a child I never paid attention during airplane mechanics class. JOSH Is this the kind of Noel Cowardesque wit I can expect all night long? JOEY [KENNY] Yes. JOSH I want to start the phone banks. They need instructions. Joey and Kenny walk towards the crowd. JOEY [KENNY] Is anyone chewing gum? CALLERS No! Josh glares at Donna, who ignores him. JOEY Okay... start! Joey looks smugly at Josh. JOSH I had already taken care of the gum thing... CUT TO: INT. WEST WING LOBBY - NIGHT The lobby is transformed into a set for "Capital Beat". Staffers stand by behind the scenes watching. STAGE MANAGER In five... four... three... ANNOUNCER [VO] Live... from the White House... it’s Capital Beat with Mark Gottfried. Tonight on Capital Beat a special expanded edition... The State of the Union. MARK [on T.V.] Good evening. I’m Mark Gottfried and tonight our show is live from the White House. We’ll be joined all night long by Republicans and Democrats, lawmakers and pundants, and we’ll be talking... Sitting behind a table on stage is host, Mark Gottfried, C.J., and Congressman Henry Shallick. MARK ...to focus groups around the country. On the panel with me right now is Deputy House Majority Whip, Henry Shallick and the very lovely, very talented Miss Claudia Jean Cregg, White House Press Secretary. C.J., on a scale of 1 to 10, how did the President do tonight? C.J. [beaming with happiness] 14. You know, Mark, the President is a commanding public speaker and the bar is usually set quite a bit higher when it’s a major address but tonight he cleared it with room to spare. MARK My official tally has him interrupted for applause 73 times. C.J. I have 72 times but I’ll take your count. MARK Henry Shallick, how did the President do tonight? SHALLICK Well, C.J.’s right. The President is a gifted public speaker. We’ve always known that, and it’s an admirable quality... not unlike juggling. Now if he had only said something. C.J. and Mark smile at each other. SHALLICK By my count, 23 of the interruptions for applause were for co-opted Republican ideas. MARK Let’s take a quick break. We’re just getting started with our post game analysis of President Bartlet’s Third State of the Union address. We’ve got guests standing by around the country. We’ll be back with more Capital Beat right after this. STAGE MANAGER We’re out. MARK [into the camera] C.J.’s not wearing any pants. C.J. Yes... MARK No pants whatsoever. C.J. It’s cable! Carol... STAGE MANAGER 90 seconds back. SAM [walks up to C.J.] Can I see you a moment? C.J. Yeah. SAM Can I see you over there? C.J. Can we do it here? SAM Why? C.J. I’m not wearing any pants. Can we do it here? SAM Sure, we’re fine here as long as there aren’t any microphones or cameras around. C.J. Carol! CAROL Yeah. [runs up and hands her a robe] C.J. Thank you. SAM You look like a Rockette. C.J. Yeah. SAM Yeah. C.J. [ties the robe around her waist] You know why I’m not wearing any pants? SAM I just assumed it was the usual reason. They walk off stage. C.J. I sat in paint. STAGE MANAGER 60 seconds back. C.J. After the speech I went to the sculpture garden to get some air and take it in and I sat on a bench. SAM And it didn’t say wet paint? C.J. It did it turns out, but... CAROL [runs up] How’s it coming? SAM Where’d you get the bathrobe? CAROL The Gym. SAM They have bathrobes at the gym? C.J. In the women’s locker room. SAM But not the men’s. C.J. Yeah. SAM Now, that’s outrageous. There’s a thousand men working here and 50 women... C.J. Yeah, and it’s the bathrobe’s that’s outrageous. STAGE MANAGER 30 seconds. C.J. What’s going on? SAM Jack Sloane has an official reprimand in his jacket. C.J. For what? SAM Excessive force. C.J. [looks angry] How long ago? SAM 17 years ago. There was a criminal charge... it was dismissed. There was a civil suit... it was dismissed. There was enormous community and political pressure from local Black Democrats. C.J. Our people? SAM 17 years ago... STAGE MANAGER 15 seconds. C.J. Okay, so they gave him an official condemnation. SAM Yeah. C.J. Does anybody have the story yet? SAM They will. C.J. I... [looks at the stage nervously] STAGE MANAGER 10 seconds. C.J. runs back to the stage. Sam and Carol follow her. C.J. I need to see the Police Officer. What was his name? SAM Sloane! C.J. tears off the robe and tosses it to Carol. C.J. Right! [sits down and puts on her mike] MARK Take the desk away and I’d pick up three share points. STAGE MANAGER In five... four... three... CUT TO: INT. OUTER OVAL OFFICE - NIGHT Mrs. Landingham stands watching the T.V. Charlie walks in. MARK [on T.V.] We’re back with out panel including Deputy House Majority Whip Henry Shallick and White House Press Secretary C.J. Cregg. MRS. LANDINGHAM Welcome back. CHARLIE How’d it look on T.V.? MRS. LANDINGHAM It looked good. Charlie, is it possible that C.J. isn’t wearing any pants right now? CHARLIE Yeah. She sat in wet paint. MRS. LANDINGHAM And she’s not wearing any pants? CHARLIE Well, she’s wearing underwear Mrs. Landingham. She hasn’t gone smokeless. MRS. LANDINGHAM Okay. Mrs. Landingham turns off the T.V. and sits behind her desk. Charlie takes out a slip of paper. CHARLIE I didn’t understand this note. MRS. LANDINGHAM The President was balancing his checkbook and came across an outstanding check for $500 that was never cashed. The check was written by the First Lady to a woman the President has never heard of and he would like you to ask her about it. CHARLIE The President was balancing his checkbook? MRS. LANDINGHAM Yeah. CHARLIE Why? MRS. LANDINGHAM He does it to relax. CHARLIE Okay. MRS. LANDINGHAM Yeah. CHARLIE And why doesn’t he just ask the First lady about the $500 check himself in the normal course of, you know, being married to her. MRS. LANDINGHAM When the President inquires into the First lady’s personal bookkeeping, the First Lady gets angry with him... and yells. CHARLIE Well, she’s gonna get angry and yell when I inquire too. MRS. LANDINGHAM Well, the President doesn’t care so much about that. [smiles] CHARLIE Yeah, okay. This is a good job. [walks out] MRS. LANDINGHAM I saw you on T.V.! CHARLIE Cool. CUT TO: INT. THE PRESIDENT'S BEDROOM - NIGHT Abbey is in the room watching the speech on tape. She rewinds... BARTLET [on T.V.] To build this new future will demand boldly setting aside our partisan blinders and abandoning our ideological entrenchment. [applause] Therefore, I am asking the leaders of Congress and members of both parties to join me in establishing a Blue Ribbon National Commission to [applause] fashion... She rewinds. BARTLET [on T.V.] ...boldly setting aside our partisan blinders and abandoning our ideological entrenchment. There is a knock at the door. ABBEY Come in! BARTLET [on T.V.] Therefore, I am asking the leaders of Congress and members of both parties to join me in establishing a Blue Ribbon National Commission to [applause] fashion... CHARLIE [enters] Mrs. Bartlet? She turns off the TV. ABBEY Hey, Charlie. CHARLIE Am I disturbing you? ABBEY I just came up to change my clothes. CHARLIE Did you sit in paint? ABBEY I’m sorry? CHARLIE C.J. sat on wet paint. ABBEY In the Sculpture Garden? CHARLIE Yeah. ABBEY No. I’m not supposed to go to the reception in the same clothes in which I went to the speech. CHARLIE Yeah. ABBEY I could just tell people that I have two outfits exactly alike. CHARLIE That’s what I do. ABBEY [smiles] What do you need? CHARLIE Ma’am, I’d like you to bear in mind that I’m not wearing pads, or a helmet or contact gear of any kind. A $500 check that hasn’t been cashed. It’s written to a woman named... ABBEY Oh, how long has that been up his ass?! CHARLIE Well I wouldn’t know ma’am, but... ABBEY [angry] Her name is Jane Robinson. I read an article a few months ago. CHARLIE Her husband threw her out... ABBEY He set fire to the bed. CHARLIE And she bought the kids Christmas presents early and they were ruined. ABBEY So I sent her $500. CHARLIE Well, she hasn’t cashed it. I’ll make sure it got to her. ABBEY Thank you. CHARLIE Thank you, Ma’am. Charlie leaves quickly. Abbey sits in the bed, turning the T.V. back on. BARTLET [on T.V.] ...me in establishing a Blue Ribbon National Commission... CUT TO: EXT. THE WHITE HOUSE - NIGHT Sound of party music. CUT TO: INT. RECEPTION HALL - CONTINUOUS A reception room is brightly lit and filled with party guests. Music is playing while waiters circulate with drinks and noshes. PARTY GUEST Hey! Sam Seaborn, everybody! Sam enters the party to applause. SAM See? You guys said I couldn’t write comedy. Sam spots Leo in the middle of the room. LEO You talk to C.J.? SAM Yeah. LEO The Dial groups are huge... middle class tax cuts, Social Security. SAM What about polling? LEO Josh and Joey will have early numbers in an hour. My point is this police officer... The President pointed to him and asked him to stand. MARGARET [walks up] Leo. SAM Let C.J. talk to him. LEO Is he here? SAM Yeah. LEO No pictures anywhere near the President. SAM Yeah. [walks off] MARGARET They need you in the Situation Room. [walks away with Leo] CUT TO: INT. SITUATION ROOM - NIGHT A group of people in suits and uniforms are assembled around the table as Leo enters. LEO What’s going on? STAFFER Leo, we believe 5 U.S. DEA Agents have been abducted in Columbia. LEO Where? STAFFER On a road between Bogotá and a training base in Putumayo. LEO Was it the C.R.F? STAFFER We don’t know. LEO Do we think it was the C.R.F? STAFFER Yeah. LEO Can the Agents be identified as U.S. Drug Enforcement? STAFFER They’re carrying badges. LEO On a road from Bogotá to Putumayo? They’re gonna shoot these guys. STAFFER Leo, I have... LEO The White House Press Corps's upstairs and there’s a live T.V. show being broadcast next door. [to Marine Officer] I need to meet with State, Justice, and the Pentagon... and it needs to happen softly. MARINE OFFICER Yes sir. Leo sits down at the table and shuffles through the folders. LEO This was almost a good night. FADE OUT. END ACT ONE * * * ACT TWO FADE IN: EXT. THE WHITE HOUSE - NIGHT Sounds of people talking on the phone. CUT TO: INT. NATIONAL STRATEGIES GROUP - NIGHT Joey and Kenny circulate through the Calling Bank. Donna is standing nearby. JOEY [KENNY] Donna! DONNA Yeah? JOEY [KENNY] It’s going well. It’s a 17% response rate. DONNA Great. JOSH [walks up] Jack Sloane was reprimanded for excessive force by the Detroit Police Department. DONNA How long ago? JOSH 17 years. DONNA What happened? JOSH I don’t know. He made a bust. He broke the guys leg. The DA couldn’t make a case. The civil suit was dismissed but it’s there. JOEY [KENNY] Who’s Jack Sloane? JOSH From tonight. Joey looks confused. JOSH The police officer. JOEY [KENNY] I wasn’t there. I was on a plane with mechanical difficulties... JOSH Officer Jack Sloane of the Detroit Police Department was added at the last minute to the invited guests that are recognized by the President during the speech. DONNA He was the off-duty cop who... JOEY [KENNY] At the Elementary School? DONNA Yeah. JOEY [KENNY] He wasn’t vetted? JOSH [starts pacing] It was last minute. When do I see numbers? DONNA Joey says it’s going good. JOSH Great! When do I see numbers? JOEY [KENNY] There’s a 17% response rate. JOSH Fantastic. When do I see numbers? JOEY You need patience, Joshua! JOSH I need numbers, Tonto! JOEY [KENNY] The poll’s an hour old! JOSH You get early numbers.... JOEY [KENNY] When I get them, you’ll have them. JOSH So, what do you do in the meantime? JOEY I’m getting a doughnut. [walks off] JOSH Okay. Josh watches them walk off. He sighs and wanders over to a desk. Donna follows. JOSH I’m plagued by this nonsense, Donna. I swear, it’s just reaching epidemic proportions. Those numbers are gonna tell us we had a big night and the balance is gonna be dragged down by a news cycle that won’t shake the cops. [sits] DONNA You should ask her out. JOSH I’m sorry? DONNA You should ask Joey out. Tonight could be the night. JOSH The night to do what? DONNA To ask her out. JOSH Get a doughnut! DONNA Okay. Donna wanders off. Josh grabs his phone. CUT TO: INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT Margaret wanders past a monitor on the way to the Lobby. MARK [on T.V.] Before we go to commercial again let me just ask for predictions. How big a bump does the President get on this speech? She approaches a small group of people laughing. One is MICKEY TROOP, the Secretary of State. MARGARET Excuse me, Mr. Secretary? MICKEY TROOP Yes? MARGARET I’m sorry for interrupting but Leo McGarry was wondering if you could come say hello to an old friend of his. MICKEY Certainly. Would you excuse me please? They wander off. MARGARET Sit Room. MICKEY Thank you. [puts his drink down] CUT TO: INT. SITUATION ROOM - NIGHT The group is sitting around the table. LEO Are we verifying exactly who was at the Lab? DEA REP We verified Agents McGraff and Nunn, but we still can’t confirm the other three. LEO I don’t want to misnotify the families. MICKEY [comes in and sits] Leo. LEO Mickey, 2:00 P.M. local time in Bogotá, 5 DEA Agents assisting police in evidence gathering at a cocaine lab were taken by the CRF. MICKEY Are they alive? LEO We think so. MICKEY Okay. Putumayo is a Frente stronghold. The agents were at one of their top producing cocaine labs. We're gonna open a dialog... we’re gonna do it with one of their own commanders. LEO Who are they talking too? MICKEY They’ll tell us but I think it’s gonna be Nelson Guerra. He’s a Frente jefe. LEO Get me everything on him. CAPTAIN Yes, sir. LEO Is there anybody close by on the ground? ROBBIE The closest we’ve got is Tres Encinas. LEO Who’s there? COLONEL Six Commanders and 13 support. LEO Really. ROBBIE Yeah. LEO How many people are gonna be guarding wherever these guys are being taken too? MICKEY Five, six hundred. LEO Not the numbers you’re hoping for if you’re contemplating a massive attack and rescue mission. MICKEY No. LEO Tell Special Operations Command at Ft. Bragg to submit three plans for a unilateral op. They have an hour. ROBBIE Yes, sir. LEO [stands] We should let these 19 guys at Tres Encinas know they’re in it now too. CAPTAIN Yes, sir. Leo walks out. CUT TO: INT. WEST WING LOBBY - NIGHT This time on the Capitol Beat dais are Ainsley Hayes and GRETCHEN TYLER of the ACLU. BARTLET [on T.V.] I challenge all our schools to teach character education. To teach values. To teach citizenship. If it means our kids will pay more attention to mathematics, and English literature, and history, and science, and the arts, and less attention to designer labels, [applause] then our public schools should be able to require students to wear school uniforms. MARK School uniforms from a liberal democrat. What was the sound we just heard? [laughs] Joining us now on our panel is Associate White House Counsel Ainsley Hayes. To my left, Gretchen Tyler, Director of Public Education for the ACLU. Gretchen let’s start with you. Were you surprised? GRETCHEN TYLER I was surprised, Mark. I was disappointed. This President has always had strong First Amendment credentials. MARK What’s the position of the ACLU? TYLER The position of the ACLU is that every child in the country has the legal right to public school education. And that can’t be conditioned on compliance with a uniform policy. MARK Ainsley? AINSLEY I think Gretchen’s point is well taken and... CUT TO: INT. COMMUNICATIONS BULLPEN - CONTINUOUS Staffers stand around in the Communications Bullpen watching a TV. Sam is among them. AINSLEY [on T.V.] ...in that I’m’ not 100% sure what the President suggested tonight is Constitutional. What I can tell you is that he is concerned about the kids left out... Sam looks unhappy and sighs. AINSLEY ...because they can’t afford the clothes some of their friends wear. Sam walks out to the HALLWAY into the LOBBY. AINSLEY He’s also taken serious note of any number of studies done by educational experts that say by and large kids will do better wearing uniforms. A guard opens the door to the LOBBY. Sam enters and stands off stage. TYLER It should be noted that there already are dress restrictions on public school kids. They’re not allowed to wear inappropriate clothing or wear something obscene on their t-shirts. AINSLEY It should also be noted that those restrictions were over the strong objection of the ACLU. MARK Ainsley, gauge for us how strongly the President feels about this. AINSLEY Well, he included it in the State of the Union Address. MARK But, from your conversations with him personally. AINSLEY Oh, I haven’t’ had any conversations with him personally. MARK On this. AINSLEY On anything. I’ve never met him. I’m an Associate Counsel. The Chinese food guy’s got more access than I do. MARK [surprised] And yet they have you out here speaking for the White House. AINSLEY Yeah! [smiles] It’s a really big night for me. [laughs] MARK All right. We’ll be back with Gretchen Tyler and Ainsley Hayes and more guests as the night goes on. We’re going to send you to New York for some other news. Stay with us. Here’s Frank and Judy. STAGE MANAGER We’re out. MARK [to Ainsley] You crack me up. AINSLEY [laughs] Thank you. SAM Hey, Gracie... AINSLEY Hey, Sam! [takes off her mike] SAM Mark, she have time? MARK It’s a five-minute newsbreak. Ainsley leaves the stage and follows Sam. AINSLEY [smiles] Have you been watching? SAM Yes. AINSLEY Aren’t I delightful? SAM Yes. They exit to the HALLWAY. SAM You know what I’d like? I’d like if you didn’t say you weren’t 100% sure the President’s proposal isn’t Constitutional. AINSLEY The ACLU has a reasonable case to make against the President. SAM They did a fine job of making it’s without the help of the President’s lawyer. They both walk into SAM'S OFFICE. AINSLEY That’s a fair point! SAM How have you never met the President? AINSLEY I haven’t. SAM You’ve been working here 3 months. AINSLEY He works in the Oval Office and I work in the Steam Pipe Trunk Distribution Venue. I can’t believe we’ve haven’t run into each other. SAM I’ll set up an introduction. AINSLEY No. SAM You can meet him tonight. AINSLEY No way. SAM It’s no problem. AINSLEY Yes, it is. SAM [looks smug] Are you scared to meet the President? AINSLEY I’m not scared to meet the President. SAM Yeah, you are. AINSLEY I am not scared to meet the President cause I’m not gonna meet the President. SAM Ainsley... AINSLEY [whining] I’m having a good night. I just want to keep having a good night. I don’t want to live in fear of the inevitable bumbling of the English language that will occur and the mortification that will ensue. SAM That sounds pretty bad. AINSLEY [stammers] I am... yes... I am indeed... Yes, I am scared to meet the President. SAM And that sounds really bad. AINSLEY Yes. SAM Okay, well when you meet him, you meet him. AINSLEY No need to rush that day. [walks out] SAM Right. [runs after her] Okay, can I talk to you about adrenaline for a second? AINSLEY Adrenaline? SAM Yeah. You’re feeling it right now and it’s gonna get even more cause it’s a big night, and you were a hit and you’ve never experienced anything like this. They stand outside the LOBBY. AINSLEY And you think I’m going to have a nutty. SAM I’m saying don’t drink until you’re off television. AINSLEY God! Thanks Sam for that debating tip. You have a feel for nuances. You say I shouldn’t be drunk when I’m representing the White House. SAM Yeah. And please don't forget you’re a blond, Republican girl and that nobody likes you. AINSLEY I’m going back on television now. SAM Try to remember you’re on our side. Ainsley reenters the lobby and Sam walks off. CUT TO: INT. RECEPTION HALL - NIGHT Abbey stands on a stage in front of the guests. The crowd is laughing. ABBEY Thank you. Thank you. Sam Seaborn wrote that line for me. You know, there’s a lot of polling going on right now. The instant-dial focus groups predict tonight’s speech was a success. [applause] And I’m sure where Josh is over at the phone banks they’ll be confirming that. But, when the numbers are crunched and the polls are taken I think everyone here realizes that the truly important thing is that I changed my hair. [laughter] Seriously, um, this is not my official toast. My official toast is later. I just wanted to say informally before the President got here. Thank you so much for your hard work and enjoy tonight’s success. Abbey toasts the crowd and steps off the stage. Leo walks up. LEO [quietly] Your hair looks great by the way. ABBEY So, what’s going on with Jack Sloane? LEO C.J.’s on it. So, we were able to get the language in about the Blue Ribbon Commission. ABBEY Yeah. They stop walking. LEO We were able to get it in at the last minute. We got our guys who changed the language to broaden the... ABBEY [angry] I was there, Leo. LEO We changed the language at the last minute, Abbey. If you want to be pissed at someone, the architect of... ABBEY I don’t want to be pissed at anyone but thanks for asking. And I don’t need to be told who the architect of tonight’s speech was. Toby enters to applause and handshakes. PARTY GUEST Toby Ziegler! Abbey leaves Leo and approaches Toby with a forced smile on her face. He leans in close as they shake hands. ABBEY I want to see you in your office in half an hour. You got it? TOBY Yes, Ma’am. [looks around uncomfortably] ABBEY Keep shaking hands. Photographers snap their pictures as Toby and Abbey shake hands. FADE OUT. END ACT TWO * * * ACT THREE FADE IN: EXT. WHITE HOUSE - NIGHT CONGRESSMAN [VO] Hang on... AINSLEY [VO] Congressman, he didn’t say that. You weren’t listening. CUT TO: INT. NATIONAL STRATEGIES GROUP - NIGHT Josh sits on a couch rapidly thumbing through "Vogue." A T.V. is playing Capitol Beat. On the dais are Ainsley and a congressman. CONGRESSMAN [on T.V.] He said... AINSLEY [on T.V.] What he said was that standardized testing would be more acceptable if these vast limitations were understood. MARK [on T.V.] What about the New York City testing scores that Hal Jaffe just cited a while ago? Josh glances at the T.V. and tosses away a magazine insert. JOSH Six out of ten were black or Hispanic. AINSLEY [on T.V.] ...forgot to mention was that six out of ten of those New York City students were either black or Hispanic. Donna leans over the back of the couch. JOSH [to the T.V.] Right on the button. DONNA So Josh... JOSH No. DONNA Are you still thinking? JOSH We’re still doing this? DONNA Have you asked her out yet? JOSH [sighs] Donna... DONNA Cause the last time I asked you you hadn’t asked her out yet. JOSH What is taking so long? [gets up and paces] DONNA 'Joey, would you like to go out Friday night.' You know, you have to say it. You have to ask a girl out on a date. You can’t just randomly tumble into a girl sideways and hopes she breaks up with you soon like you always do. [sits down at a desk] JOSH Why not? DONNA Cause you can’t! JOSH You just said I always do. DONNA Josh, I can help you or not help you. It’s up to you. JOSH Then I absolutely choose NOT helping me. DONNA You want me to ask her out for you? Joey and Kenny walk by. JOSH [sarcastic] Yeah. That’s exactly what I want you to do. DONNA Joey... [gets up] JOSH Sit down. [Both sit.] Where are the first numbers? JOEY [KENNY] Soon. JOSH How soon? JOEY [KENNY] Five minutes. JOSH You said five minutes 15 minutes ago! JOEY [KENNY] The response rate slowed down. JOSH Why? JOEY [KENNY] People are going to bed. JOSH Yeah, but the response rate didn’t stop, right? Everybody didn't go to bed. If they did that would be phenomenal. It would be a phenomenon! JOEY [KENNY] The response rate slowed down, and you need to have some juice and crackers. JOSH America is talking and I’m trying to hear what they’re saying. JOEY [KENNY] They’re saying that you’re an egomaniac who needs to know that the public loves you and that you’ll have the numbers in five minutes. JOSH Well, I don’t think that is what they’re saying but absent any other information... JOEY [frustrated] Josh... JOSH Joey, it’s the State of the Union. We worked on this speech for three months! JOEY [KENNY] You will hear America speak... JOSH In five minutes. JOEY [KENNY] In five minutes. As Josh sighs, there is a loud bang and the entire block is plunged into darkness. People complain and they look around. JOEY [KENNY] May take a little longer now. They’re left sitting in the dark. CUT TO: INT. WEST WING LOBBY - NIGHT Toby and Congressman Shallick are on the dais of Capitol Beat. Ginger is in the crowd. SHALLICK Excuse me... TOBY I don’t... SHALLICK Excuse me. But this White House uses the first amendment to protect flag burning, to protect pornography, to ban school prayer. Why when the second amendment clearly says that the federal government will not infringe upon a citizens... TOBY Because it doesn’t... SHALLICK ...right to keep and bear arms... TOBY It doesn’t barely say that. SHALLICK Toby! TOBY In fact it doesn’t say that at all. The only way it says that at all is if you remove some words from it. SHALLICK Oh, look. Will you...? TOBY It says a well-regulated militia, being necessary for the security of the free state... the government shall not infringe. The words regulated and militia are in the first sentence. I don’t think the Framer’s were thinking of three guys in a Dodge Durango. SHALLICK Well, you don’t really know what the Framers were thinking, do you? TOBY No. But I do know that if you combine the populations of Great Britain, France, Germany, Japan, Switzerland, Sweden, Denmark and Australia you’ve got a population roughly the size of the United States. We had 32,000 gun deaths last year and they had 112. Do you think it’s because Americans are more homicidal by nature? Or do you think it’s because those guys have gun control laws? MARK We’re going to talk to some people and hear answers to that question. You’re watching an expanded edition of Capital Beat coming live from the West Wing of the White House. We’ll be back after this. STAGE MANAGER We’re out. GINGER Toby... Ginger gestures and Toby removes his mic. TOBY Mark, I’m gonna sit out the next segment. MARK Yeah? TOBY Yeah, I’ve got to see someone. I’ll get you a body. [follows Ginger] Has she been waiting long? GINGER No. CUT TO: INT. TOBY’S OFFICE - CONTINUOUS Abbey is pacing in the office as Toby enters. TOBY I’m sorry I’m late. ABBEY It’s fine. TOBY I was on the air. ABBEY I wanted to ask you... TOBY Mrs. Bartlet... ABBEY Toby. TOBY Excuse me for interrupting. I just wanted to remind you that there’s press coming in and out of this area. [looks around] ABBEY Are you under the impression I’m going to have a fit of some kind? TOBY No, ma’am. ABBEY So, what was the deal? He gets a highway and you name a park after him? TOBY Mrs. Bartlet, the Blue Ribbon Commission... ABBEY The Blue Ribbon Commission is swell. I am not talking about the Blue Ribbon Commission, and you know it. And don’t talk to me like I’m ‘other people’. You’ve never done that. Toby stares at her. ABBEY It was the language. TOBY Mrs. Bartlet? ABBEY The draft I read said, "The first fiscal priority of the government must be, will be ensuring social security and Medicare." Now how did that turn into "boldly setting aside our partisan blinders"? Is the White House considering new options? TOBY Look... ABBEY Raising retirement age? TOBY Abbey... ABBEY And how did school uniforms get in such a prominent spot? TOBY It was in a section on education reform, Abbey and considering other options doesn’t mean we’re caving on retirement age and you know it. So, what was your concern with the language? ABBEY The draft said, "Our commitment to the full benefits promised to America's greatest generation is absolute." I was there when you wrote that. TOBY And our commitment is still absolute. We’re open to new ideas and that’s what it said. ABBEY Oh, please... TOBY Believe me, we gave Republicans plenty to be pissed about... the surplus, missile defense, capital gains. And I was just on T.V. for the 900th time and alienated gun owners... to say nothing of people who own Dodge Durango’s. So, what exactly was your problem with the language? ABBEY It seemed... TOBY Abbey... ABBEY I was just thrown by the last minute changes. [looks uncomfortable] You should get back on T.V. [walks out] CUT TO: INT. CAROL’S OFFICE - NIGHT Carol stands in her office as C.J. walks by. C.J. He’s here? CAROL Yeah. Waiting inside C.J.'S OFFICE is Officer JACK SLOANE. C.J. Officer Sloane. SLOANE Yes, ma’am. C.J. I’m C.J. Cregg. [They shake hands.] I’m the White House Press Secretary and I’m sorry to get you out of the party. SLOANE Aw, it’s all right. C.J. I’m sorry to be abrupt but I’m racing the clock a little bit. They sit. C.J. Could you tell me what happen 17 years ago with a suspect named Walter Tapus? Sloane looks uncomfortable. C.J. I can access the information through the FBI and call the Wayne county DA... SLOANE Do I need to have my lawyer here? C.J. I don’t think you do but if you’d like to call... SLOANE No. There was an armed robbery in progress. I was pursuing Walter Tapus on foot through a series of fence in storage areas behind a warehouse. I apprehended him and tried to cuff him during which he broke my hand and nose. C.J. So you fractured his leg. SLOANE I didn’t fracture his leg. C.J. He said you kicked him repeatedly while he was handcuffed. SLOANE He was suing the city for $5 million. What possible motivation would he have had to lie? C.J. Officer... SLOANE He was 19 years old. 6’2" 190 pounds. And he won 2 bronze medals at the State High School Track and Field Championships. Miss Cregg, look at me. Do you think there’s any way I catch up to this guy if his leg isn’t fractured already? [firmly] It didn’t happen. C.J. Why didn’t you tell anybody this was on your record when you were invited here? SLOANE I just assumed... I mean... 'cause of what happened over the weekend at the elementary school... C.J. Yeah. [looks down] SLOANE I assumed, you know, that it was okay now... That... I was okay. I didn’t think it was all gonna come up again. Does the press know? C.J. No, but I have to tell them. SLOANE Why? C.J. Cause they’ll find out and I have to stay ahead of the pitch. If I issue it in a brief statement then it doesn't look like we’re trying to hide anything and I get to control the story for a while. SLOANE [looks stricken] There is no story. C.J. Officer... SLOANE The DA couldn’t bring a case. The civil suit was dismissed. C.J. The President pointed to you as an example. SLOANE [plaintively] I AM an example. C.J. It’s a story. SLOANE Cause you’re giving it to them. C.J. Cause they’ll find it anyway. SLOANE You don’t know that. C.J. Yes, I do. SLOANE My... My, um... My wife and kids are back at the party. C.J. You should go back there. They stand. SLOANE Yeah. [turns away] C.J. Don’t talk to anybody about this. SLOANE Yeah. C.J. I wish you had said something to us before. Sloane stands in the doorway. SLOANE Yeah. I just assumed. Thought it was okay now. Sloane leaves with C.J. standing. CUT TO: INT. NATIONAL STRATEGIES GROUP - NIGHT Donna sits in the dark talking into the phone. She scribbles into her pad by flashlight. Josh sits nearby with his head in his hands. DONNA Okay. [hangs up] Good news. [reads from her pad] The Potomac Electric Power Company says the outage was caused by a 13,000-volt cable that caught fire in a building on M Street and Wisconsin. JOSH How is that good news? DONNA [shines the flashlight in his face] Well, we have hard information now. JOSH When’s the power going back on? DONNA That information isn’t available at this time. JOSH Donna... DONNA I can tell you that [reads from pad] the outage is affecting some 2,000 customers and it was likely started when a repairman mis-sliced... [shakes head] something... JOSH Call Sam. [yells] I want the numbers! DONNA You know Josh, everyone else is having fun with this. Donna dials the phone. Joey and Kenny sneak up. JOSH You’re the only one who’s having fun with this. Nobody else is having fun with this. Joey bumps into Josh. JOEY Boo! [laughing] How you doing? JOSH Are those numbers safe? JOEY Yes. JOSH Are we gonna be able to make the West Coast calls? JOEY [KENNY] It depends on when the power goes on. JOSH When’s that gonna be? JOEY Hey! JOEY [KENNY] Do I look like Electricity Girl? JOSH No. DONNA [into phone] I’m thinking of leading everybody in song. JOSH Is that Sam? DONNA Yeah. JOSH Give it to me. [grabs the phone and stalks away] CUT TO: INT. NORTH ENTRANCE - NIGHT Sam stands in the hallway. JOSH Sam. SAM What’s going on? JOSH The power’s down. SAM I know. JOSH We’re five minutes away from an East Coast sample. We got nothing west of Indiana, Illinois... SAM You need anything? JOSH A lightning bolt, a key, and a kite. SAM Donna told me to tell you you should ask out Joey Lucas. JOSH Hey, can I tell ya Donna’s been acting kind of... SAM I gotta go. Sam abruptly hangs up. Bartlet, staffers and Secret Service Agents enter THE WHITE HOUSE. AGENT [into hand mic] We’re in. SAM [walks up] Sir. BARTLET How’s it going? They shake hands. SAM They lost power at National Strategies. BARTLET I heard. STAFFER 1 Well done, Mr. President. BARTLET [to staffer] Thank you. [to Sam] Listen you scored big on some of the stuff I fought you on. [acknowledges staffers as they walk by] SAM Yes, and I know a way you can repay me. BARTLET Repay you for what? SAM For you being wrong in the face of me being right. BARTLET [waves] I owe you money for that? SAM Oh, not money, sir. BARTLET I owe you anything for that? STAFFER 2 Great job, Mr. President! BARTLET [waving] Thank you. SAM Ainsley Hayes has been working here for three months and she’s still a little frightened of meeting you. If you should happen you run into her in the halls perhaps you could make a point... [They stop walking] ...of introducing yourself and welcoming her personally. BARTLET Don’t you already get paid? Charlie walks up. SAM Randomly in the hallways in the next few days you two are bound to be in the same place at the same time. Would you just... CHARLIE Mr. President... BARTLET [to Charlie] Hang on. [to Sam] Is there anything in particular you’d like me to say? SAM [dives right in] I think if you said something along the lines of "You know, a lot of people assumed you were hired because you’re a blonde, republican sex kitten and they were obviously wrong". [nodding] And to keep up the good work. BARTLET [smiling] That’s really good. SAM [realizes what he said] Yeah. CHARLIE Mr. President. BARTLET Yeah. Bartlet nods and walks away with Charlie. Sam looks embarrassed and walks off. Bartlet looks back over his shoulder at Sam. He walks in the OUTER OVAL OFFICE to find Leo standing there. LEO Mr. President. BARTLET What’s going on with the police officer? LEO C.J.’s looking into it. BARTLET We’re going to get knocked off the story by a... LEO The cop isn’t what’s going to knock us off the story. Leo opens the door for Bartlet. BARTLET What is? They enter THE OVAL OFFICE. Assembled inside are the players from the Situation Room. LEO We have a situation in Colombia. FADE OUT. END ACT THREE * * * ACT FOUR FADE IN: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - NIGHT Bartlet stands behind the couch reading a brief. BARTLET They can be identified as drug agents? DEA REP They were dressed as civilians but they’ve got DEA badges. BARTLET Yeah, they may have blown their cover. DEA REP Sir. BARTLET Mickey, how do we know they’re still alive? MICKEY Human sources paid by the Colombian National Police confirm they’re in a CRF outpost. BARTLET And they kill our guys unless Santos releases Juan Aguilar from a prison in Bogotá. MICKEY Which the Columbian government isn’t going to do. LEO It doesn’t matter. BARTLET Why not? LEO The Frente doesn’t care about Juan Aguilar and how long he stays in jail. They want to kill these guys. MICKEY I don’t think... LEO They want to drag their bodies through the streets. These people provide 70% of the world’s cocaine. They have 122,000 hectares of coca. The Putumaya region alone produced 400 billion dollars in cocaine for them last year. The government has no control over the region. There is no law and they’re gonna shoot these guys in the head and then have a parade. MICKEY If they wanted to kill them they’d already be dead. BARTLET Robbie... ROBBIE Okay. Mr. President, this plan is called Cassiopeia. [hands Bartlet a brief] Three M-860 Blackhawks, two MM-6 Littlebirds and an AC-130 Gunship. Bartlet sits. GENERAL Each Blackhawk has 10 Delta commandos from Special Forces. BARTLET How long? ROBBIE Five to seven minutes. BARTLET How many Frente casualties? LEO Do you care? Bartlet looks at Leo for a long time. BARTLET [shaking head] No. MICKEY Mr. President, I want to strongly urge that we continue negotiating. BARTLET You think we’re headed for Vietnam? MICKEY I think if we make an armed attack, the Frente will hit back. BARTLET How? MICKEY I think they will bomb our embassy. I think they will kill Diplomats. I think they will kill citizens in captivity. All of which will require is a military response. It could unify the drug lords. It could destabilize the region. Yes, I think it could lead to a war. LEO Lead to a war? We’re in a war. We’re sending people down there to fight a war on drugs. These guys aren’t hostages, they’re prisoners. BARTLET How long is it going to take Special Forces to mobilize? ROBBIE There are 141’s right now on the way to Tres Encinas. We can give them a go order in three hours. BARTLET [looks at his watch] Well then, I want our people to keep talking to Nelson Guerra. But in three hours I want to be ready to kick in the back door. ROBBIE Yes sir. BARTLET Leo, I’d like the Senior Staff. Would you round them up? LEO Yes, sir. Bartlet rises to leave. Everyone stands. BARTLET [to Leo] I’ll be wandering the halls. LEO Thank you, Mr. President. ALL Thank you, Sir. Bartlet leaves. CUT TO: INT. NATIONAL STRATEGIES GROUP - NIGHT Donna and Josh sit in the darkness. Joey and Kenny sit on the couch. Outside, a Power Truck can be seen driving slowly down the street. DONNA You know what I’m surprised about? JOSH [long pause] What? DONNA We haven’t seen a lot of looting. JOSH Yeah. DONNA Usually in these cases you see a lot more looting... JOSH Yeah. DONNA ...general civil unrest... JOSH Yeah. [looks at his watch] DONNA ...people get on each other’s nerves. JOSH [looks at her] Okay. Frustrated, Josh rises and walks over to the couch. JOSH Joey... can I ask you what may be a silly question? JOEY [KENNY] Sure. JOSH It’s not possible is it for us to just open one of these computers with a screwdriver and get the numbers that are in there, right? The phone rings. JOEY [KENNY] Why would you think that would be a silly question? JOSH [yells] I WANT THESE NUMBERS! DONNA [walks up with the cell phone] Josh? JOSH Yeah. DONNA It’s Sam. [hands him the phone] JOSH Yeah. CUT TO: INT. SAM’S OFFICE - NIGHT Sam stands in the office. SAM You gotta come back. JOSH [VO] What’s going on? SAM I don’t know. Leo wants everybody back. Leave Joey and Donna for a while. CUT TO: INT. NATIONAL STRATEGIES GROUP - NIGHT JOSH I’ll be right there. Josh hangs up and walks back to Donna. Sam looks momentarily confused and steps out of his office. CUT TO INT. COMMUNICATION’S BULLPEN - CONTINUOUS Ginger sits at her desk. SAM Ginger? GINGER Yeah. SAM Isn’t Ainsley Hayes supposed to be meeting me now? GINGER She’s in her office. SAM Isn’t she supposed to be meeting me here? GINGER She needs to meet you in her office. SAM Why? GINGER She can’t wear her pants. Sam looks confused and walks off. CUT TO: INT. AINSLEY’S OFFICE- NIGHT Ainsley is dancing and singing to "Blame It on the Bossa Nova". She dressed in a White House robe. She doesn’t see Sam slowly walk up the hall. AINSLEY [singing and dancing] Blame it on the bossa nova with its magic spell... Sam stands outside the door as she continues to sing and dance. AINSLEY Blame it on the bossa nova that he did so well... SAM [slowly enters] Ainsley! Ainsley turns, laughs, and continues singing and dancing. AINSLEY Oh, it all began with just a little dance [tightens the robe] but soon it ended up a big romance. SAM Well, I hardly know where to start. AINSLEY I was feeling so good after my segment that I went into the sculpture garden. [smiles] SAM You guys... really, there’s a wet paint sign on the bench. AINSLEY My assistant went to get me clothes. [dances] SAM Why are you moving like that? AINSLEY I’m Blaming it on the Bossa Nova! SAM [laughing] Okay. AINSLEY I know what you mean about that adrenaline high. [picks up a drink] I definitely think I got it. Plus, the bartender made me a Pink Squirrel Suzy. I’m not the teetotaler you think I am. [takes a drink] SAM Is there any alcohol in that at all? AINSLEY There’s a dash of crème d’cacao, my friend. She offers him a drink as she dances. Sam laughs and blushes. SAM I came down here to tell you... AINSLEY Oh, dance with me, Sam! Ainsley dances up to him. He looks bashful. She dances away and starts singing. AINSLEY ...a family, Bartlet slowly walks up the hall. AINSLEY And when our kids ask... Ainsley turns and screams as she sees Bartlet standing in the doorway. Her drink goes flying. Sam turns towards the doorway. He turns back to Ainsley with an embarrassed expression. BARTLET [casually] What’s up? Ainsley stands horrified. AINSLEY Mr. President! BARTLET I never even knew we HAD a nightclub down here. Sam looks embarrassed. AINSLEY Oh, my gosh! Ainsley quickly turns off the radio. SAM Mr. President, I don’t believe you’ve met Ainsley Hayes. Ainsley gathers her dignity and tightens the robe. BARTLET Yeah. Ainsley, I wanted to say hello and to you know... mention "a lot of people assumed you were hired because you’re a blonde, republican sex kitten" and well, they’re obviously wrong. Keep up the good work. AINSLEY Yes, sir. BARTLET [to Sam] You know we’re meeting? SAM Yes sir. Bartlet nods and leaves. SAM That could have been worse. Ainsley looks nauseous. SAM No, probably not. [leaves] CUT TO: INT. WEST WING LOBBY - NIGHT C.J. is back on the Capital Beat dais, fully clothed. MARK And take us behind the scenes. What are the President and the First Lady doing right now? C.J. Well, the reception's still going on. I don’t know if you can hear the music. And the President and Mrs. Bartlet are likely to stay up late with friends. MARK All right. We’re staying up late too. Maybe we’ll be invited to the party. C.J. laughs. MARK We’re going to take a break and come right back. STAGE MANAGER We’re out. C.J. How you holding out? MARK You got a second? C.J. Yeah. They remove their mics and step behind stage. MARK I’ve laid off it all night because we’ve done some things together and I didn’t want to ambush you, but... C.J. You know about Sloane. MARK Yeah. C.J. Mark... MARK C.J.... C.J. Mark, I talked to the guy. And before the stampede begins... Toby stands in the doorway. C.J. ...please give me a chance... TOBY C.J.... C.J. looks at Toby them back at Mark. C.J. Let me talk to you before... TOBY C.J. C.J. looks back at Toby. TOBY Leo Mc Garry would like you to meet an old friend of his. C.J. Mark, give me 20 minutes before you break the story. MARK Why? C.J. We’ve done things together. MARK I’m looking at my watch. C.J. runs out. She and Toby walk off. CUT TO: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE KITCHEN - NIGHT Party music and conversation can be heard as Bartlet enters the kitchen. Chefs and stewards work preparing food. Seated at a counter is Abbey, eating a sandwich. Bartlet approaches her. BARTLET Hey. ABBEY Hey. BARTLET They said you were in here. ABBEY Yeah, just for a minute. BARTLET [looks over at the kitchen staff] Fellas... As they exit, Bartlet nods to them. Abbey avoids his gaze. BARTLET You’re mad at me. ABBEY Jed, you know what? I’m not your mommy. BARTLET Abbey, so I indicated we were open to new ideas. How did I fail you this time? ABBEY You didn’t fail anybody, Jed. They’ve been giving you some pretty decent style points. Bartlet looks sharply at her. Abbey avoids his glare. BARTLET I have a meeting. [turns and starts to walk out] ABBEY At what point in the process did you decide not to mention the Violence Against Women Act in tonight’s address? BARTLET [turns back] Things had to be cut. ABBEY Jane Robinson, by the way, is the name of the woman I made the check out to. It wasn’t cashed because she framed it. Charlie tracked her down in a Battered Women’s Shelter and that’s what made me think of the Violence Against Women Act. BARTLET To make a 90 minute speech into an 80 minute speech things had to go. ABBEY [angry] It's a good thing it didn’t have to be any shorter or school uniforms might not have made the cut. BARTLET Abbey. ABBEY We had a deal! BARTLET Right now... ABBEY You made a promise. We made a deal! BARTLET Abbey. ABBEY When did you decide you were going to run for a second term? BARTLET [looks at her with surprise] That’s not what tonight’s... ABBEY That’s ALL what tonight’s speech was about! [long pause] You kicked off your reelection campaign, and I’m sitting here eating a sandwich cause we had a deal! [holds back tears] BARTLET That was three years ago. ABBEY [nods] Yeah. BARTLET I have Special Forces headed to Columbia on ready alert. They'll be ready for an order in a little less than three hours. ABBEY What happened? Charlie enters. BARTLET The Frente took five DEA Agents in Putumayo... CHARLIE Mr. President. BARTLET Yeah? CHARLIE The Senior Staff’s together. BARTLET I’ll be right there. CHARLIE Yes, sir. [leaves] BARTLET Abbey... ABBEY [stands] No, you’ve got to focus right now. BARTLET All right. [sighs] I’ve got to go. ABBEY I'll stay up with you. Bartlet looks at her as he walks away. Abbey stands for a moment then exits. In the entry way she pauses, straightens her hair, and composes herself before she exits to the crowded RECEPTION HALL, and mingles with the guests. MARK [on T.V.] Welcome back. If you’re just joining us we’re here live tonight from the West Wing of the White House with an all star panel. And we’re talking about the State of the Union and it appears it’s a blockbuster. Claire Wilburn joins us now from the Chicago Sun-Times... DISSOLVE TO: END TITLES. FADE TO BLACK. THE END * * * The West Wing and all its characters are properties of Aaron Sorkin, John Wells Production, Warner Brothers Television, and NBC. No copyright infringement is intended. Episode 2.13 -- “Bartlet's Third State of the Union” Original Airdate: February 7, 2001, 9:00 PM EST